The easy answer is yes. But the truth is, it’s up to you.
When I’m not in the mood for a solo trip and I haven’t quite identified a travel bae, I explore the option of traveling with a platonic friend.
Late 2021, two friends on social media publicized a trip they took; it was not a baecation, but just two friends traveling together. Some people weren’t feeling it, but the majority of non-married folks voted that they either have or would travel with a friend.
While the talk on social media seems to be trending in support of this, that’s just talk and I think it’s still taboo in our culture. But why? I think the root of why this is taboo is about having true friendships. The question isn’t can you/would you/have you traveled with platonic friends, it’s do you have platonic friends. We (millennials) weren’t taught that we have platonic friends and *whispers* we don’t have platonic friends because we don’t know how to be friends.
We are in an overly sexualized society and we are hyper focused on attraction. Before we even speak to a person, we’ve made up our mind already. We’ve decided if we are attracted to them, what about them we’re attracted to, and what we want from them. The most important of those is the final one, where we often decide between a relationship or a situationship, but almost never a friendship. Even if friendship is considered, attraction was considered first. So the question isn’t can people travel with platonic friends, rather can you? Do you have platonic friends? Are you a friend? Do you even know what a platonic friend is? To make sure we’re on the same page, a platonic friend is a person that you can be intimate and affectionate with, but not physical or sexual way. The relationship is platonic because you choose to be friends.
Once you’ve sorted all of that out with yourself, you’re one step closer to traveling with friends of all genders, but you’re not done. You still have to get on one accord with your friend(s) before you can even consider traveling together. You have to talk to them and make sure you’re both on the same page that your friendship is not moving forward with the hope of a romantic relationship. That can be tricky, but my go to method is to be direct and open about what I want from the friendship and ask what they want from the friendship. After you both are on the same page and feel comfortable, you’re ready.
Majority of people shared that they haven’t traveled with platonic friends, but they would. If you didn’t know how to, I just gave you my recipe. I’ve traveled with platonic friends and it’s been great. For me, as a woman, it was like having the freedom of solo travel, but the company to laugh with over dinner or on an adventure. The idea first came up when my friend and I realized we had similar desires to travel, and he asked me to go on a trip out of the country. I was super excited and really nervous because we were friends, but as a heterosexual woman, friendships with men aren’t exactly promoted. I still really wanted to go out of the country. This was 2019 and I had been using my PTO exclusively for travel, so I didn’t want to pass up the chance to see a new place. I ended up having a direct conversation with my friend about what I was comfortable with, what I wasn’t comfortable with, and what I expected on the trip. He was on the same page and we spent 5 days in Belize! The trip was so much fun. We did so many adventurous activities, had lots laughs over dinners, saw beautiful sunrises/sunsets, and took photos to prove it.
The benefits of traveling with platonic friends are limitless. You create memories that last forever and will never be tainted by the emotional weight of a romantic relationship. This is the cheat code. I value my friendships because they are the people I choose to bring on my journey in life. Why wouldn’t I want to share my travel journey with them?
Travel Tip #26: Show your friends love, too.
Now that Valentine’s Day is over. Don’t forget about your friends, the people you choose to do life with. Friends need love, too.
This week, plan a date with a friend. It could be a lunch date, dinner date, park date, movie date, taco date, whatever kind of date works for your friendship. Just don’t forget to show your friends love.
Be a friend,
Mai